{"id":86642,"date":"2026-09-14T12:07:15","date_gmt":"2026-09-14T16:07:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/?page_id=86642"},"modified":"2026-10-03T21:25:19","modified_gmt":"2026-10-04T01:25:19","slug":"bewitched-quotes","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/quotes\/bewitched-quotes\/","title":{"rendered":"Bewitched > Quotes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\tJack<\/b>: How would you like to be on a television show?
\nIsabel<\/b>: An actress?
\nJack<\/b>: Yeah, if I can act, you can act.
\nWaitress: Amen.
\nJack<\/b>: You know what? I think those people over there just finished their plate of hummus.\n
\nIsabel<\/b>: Your life is total instant gratification, Daddy.
\nNigel<\/b>: It’s fantastic, isn’t it?
\nIsabel<\/b>: No. No, it’s not. Because how do you know that anyone really loves you for yourself? It’s like those rich men who are never sure why women sleep with them.
\nNigel<\/b>: But women sleep with them, so it’s not really a problem.\n
\nUncle Arthur<\/b>: Do you want the long version or the short version? Keep in mind, the long version is in Aramaic.
\nJack<\/b>: The short version.
\nUncle Arthur<\/b>: You got involved with a witch, and when you do that… weird stuff happens.
\nJack<\/b>: That’s it?
\nUncle Arthur<\/b>: Do I have to explain everything to you? Okay, here’s the deal. I’m not real. Iris is a witch.
\nJack<\/b>: Iris is a witch?
\nUncle Arthur<\/b>: Don’t dwell. And in my opinion, that manager of yours, Richie…
\nJack<\/b>: What?
\nUncle Arthur<\/b>: …isn’t even human!\n
\n

Jack<\/b>: Am I gonna get pregnant? Because I cannot get pregnant right now!<\/p>\n

\nIsabel<\/b>: Isn’t there a spell that can make you stop crying?
\nNigel<\/b>: No, darling, there isn’t.
\nIsabel<\/b>: He’s idiotic, and yet I find him completely charming. It’s been like that since the beginning. Only now, I also hate him.
\nNigel<\/b>: Love.
\nIsabel<\/b>: Daddy, what am I gonna do?
\nNigel<\/b>: Go home.
\nIsabel<\/b>: Where’s that?
\nNigel<\/b>: Wherever you’ve been the happiest.\n
\nRitchie<\/b>: Will you stop it? You’re being the mayor of Pussytown!
\nJack<\/b>: I don’t want to be the mayor of Pussytown!
\nRitchie<\/b>: I want you to get out there and be the sheriff of Ballsville!\n
\n

Jack<\/b>: Your home… is with me.<\/p>\n

\nIsabel<\/b>: I just want to be normal.
\nJack<\/b>: Acting is better than normal. You get to pretend to be normal.\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jack: How would you like to be on a television show? Isabel: An actress? Jack: Yeah, if I can act, you can act. Waitress: Amen. Jack: You know what? I think those people over there just finished their plate of hummus. Isabel: Your life is total instant gratification, Daddy. Nigel: It’s fantastic, isn’t it? Isabel:…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":47590,"parent":88021,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"inline_featured_image":false,"cybocfi_hide_featured_image":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[10894],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-86642","page","type-page","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-quotes"],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/86642","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=86642"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/86642\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":88797,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/86642\/revisions\/88797"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/88021"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/47590"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=86642"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=86642"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theromcomcatalog.com\/staging\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=86642"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}